Connecting to Your Home Frequency & Quantum Love In The Second Half Of Life
Hot Takes From My Conversation with Dr. Laura Berman
Hi, good peeps! We are going to dig deep to find the sweet spot for learning to reconnect with our partners on an emotional and physical level. That’s why I want to share my conversation with Dr. Laura Berman who is a world-leading expert and therapist in sex, love, and relationships.
Dr. Berman is an award-winning host of the nationally syndicated show, Uncovered Radio, and the New York Times bestselling author of nine books. She hosted and starred in several TV shows including OWN’s In the Bedroom with Laura Berman, The Laura Berman Show, and Sexual Healing on Showtime. She also has a new podcast launching called, The Language of Love. Dr. Berman is sharing the tools we need to intensify and re-energize our connections and love lives in the second half of life.
Grab those golden sh*t shovels as we learn how to deepen our connection to ourselves and how to intensify our sexual and personal energies… this conversation is dripping with gold!
Emotions = Energy
Your body's emotions and thoughts are all made up of the same thing: energy. The way you hold your body affects how you feel, and how you feel affects what you think. All of these energies are intertwined. Whether it's sadness, joy, fear, or rage, emotions are nothing more than energy moving through our bodies.
So, how can I change my emotions?
Find your home frequency. Think of the moments in life where you feel the most “you.” That feeling is what Dr. Berman calls your “home frequency.” It’s when you feel safe and calm, yet energized and excited. Start to notice those moments when you get that feeling and then begin to memorize it. Notice where you are, what you’re doing, and who you're with. Is there a certain smell or sensation that you associate with it? Practice coming back to this state as often as possible, preferably in a non-triggered situation.
Practice what it might feel like when your dreams are realized. Think about your dreams and desires and imagine how it would feel in your body if they were to come true. Get really clear on the feeling, more so than the actual event itself. This changes your neurochemicals, your body chemistry, and it moves you into energetic coherence with what you desire.
We Are All Connected
Everyone in your space is connected. Not only are we all connected, but we’re also constantly matching each other's energetic frequencies. It's important to put good energy out there so that the people around you will match your energy and bring good energy back.
So how do I stay true to myself if I’m always matching energy with the people around me?
Practice tuning in to your home frequency. Remember your home frequency? This is the truest energetic expression of your being. Perfect the skill of remaining in your own energy, even if everyone around you is expecting you to match them.
Choose your frequency. Laura says that the people who are around you all the time, like your romantic partner or your kids, energetically train one another and match each other's frequencies. She goes on to say that if you start to get good at moving yourself into the frequency of connection, appreciation, and love, all you have to do is be in that energy and everyone in the household will match it. She says it's a Jedi mind trick for your relationships because you are setting the energetic frequency that everybody else is matching.
How Do We Apply This To Our Everyday Life?
Check-in with your thoughts and emotions throughout the day. It is up to you to shape your reality. You have the power to create or reshape the landscape of any relationship. Start with noticing how you feel throughout the day and making a conscious effort to move into your home frequency. You can choose how you feel towards people and the energy that you put out there. This starts with you and no one else.
The way you hold on to emotions will affect your life, especially when they're negative emotions. If you hold on to negative emotions, that's the energy that you put out into the world. That’s also the energy that you'll get back.
It starts with your beliefs, then with your thoughts. The story you make up about something creates your feelings and thoughts around it. Take inventory of the stories and beliefs you hold about your life, yourself, and your relationships. Are they helping you or are they setting you back?
Write out your stories and beliefs. You can start to challenge your thoughts by questioning your stories and beliefs. Writing them down helps you get it all out in the open so you can start to recognize the patterns in your beliefs. This is how you can work through them and rewrite your story.
Spicing Things Up
Now to the steamy part of quantum physics…how to spice it up in the bedroom! Yes, some people want advice around positions, role-play, or toys. But what people are looking for when they spice it up is…the intensity. We want that feeling back that we had at the beginning of our relationship where everything was new and exciting.
So, what can we do to increase the intensity?
Get clear about your energy. You can have all the toys in the world and new positions to try, but eventually, you will run out of intensity with those as well. It's about becoming aware of the energy that moves through you during sex. Tune into your home frequency and notice how amazing it feels to have sex from a place of authenticity.
Try out the sparkly pink vagina technique. You put all of your conscious awareness into your vagina. Imagine the walls of your vagina becoming like molten pink, sparkly, swirling energy, hot lava that is swirling all around his penis. Your partner will not even be aware he felt it.
Create an energetic circle. When you are having intercourse imagine love from the universe coming in through the top of your head, flowing out of your genitals into him so that he can receive it, and then feeling it coming back through your heart.
If you want more great information on this topic, get Dr. Berman's book Quantum Love: Use Your Body's Atomic Energy to Create the Relationship You Deserve.
This episode was filled with some super cool and actionable items to help you tune into yourself, your family, and your partner. You can find your home frequency and match it to your relationships. You can even use your home frequency to spice things up in your love life. So, grab your golden sh*t shovel and start digging into your home frequency.
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